And I’m back! A few months ago my laptop died a sudden, sad and painful death. Long story short, it has taken almost three months to arrange getting it fixed. But it is, and I have really missed this little space.
To be totally honest, motherhood has been tough recently. Belle has been hitting that two and half mark early and HARD. Potty training attempts, plenty of strong opinions, a fierce desire for independence, hourly irrational requests, tantrums, testing boundaries and demanding my total attention: it’s exhausting. All that, combined with Freddie starting teething and separation anxiety, plus the two hourly nighttime nursing. I am totally spent.
Then this Friday topped off the week when we went to visit a friend for breakfast and Belle (accidentally-ish) threw a ceramic pig at me, hitting my cheek bone and then bouncing off my face onto Freddie’s head. After a good amount of tears Freddie was fine but I got to leave with a little black eye as my souvenir for the week that we have had. Lots of tears, all round.
That said, motherhood is teaching me that there are really wonderful times and that there are really hard times, but that they all pass. The one guarantee that I can start relying on is that nothing stays the same for long, good or bad. I have to remember that on those harder weeks.
But this was one of those harder weeks and a quiet, plan free family Saturday was exactly what we needed. The fact that we finally got that on a snow day was the cherry on the top.
J was amazing this morning – he could see that I needed the sleep and he took Belle out for the whole morning which meant that Freddie and I could sleep in until 9am! 9AM! I don’t remember the last time that I slept in that late. It was glorious and Freddie woke up in the happiest mood ever after his long lie in. Providing that he is cuddled up to his Mama, that boy would sleep all day. I think he just appreciates the peace and quiet – me too Freds!
It is incredible how a few hours extra sleep and a quiet morning (with just the baby) can reset you. Freddie happily played on the floor in the bathroom whilst I had a bath, painted my toes, drank a hot coffee and started to feel like a human again. By the time that Belle and Jono got back at lunchtime I was reset. Thank you J for knowing what I need better than I do.
So this afternoon we bundled up and ventured out into the snow. It was Belle’s first time playing in the snow. We had some ‘okay’ East Coast snow days last year but she was not into it and hated the feel of the snow falling on her face. So this was the first snowfall where she actually wanted to go out and play.
Freddie needed a nap, so we zipped him into our trusty 7am stroller blanket (East Coast parents – these are the BEST thing for getting through these winters with little ones!) and headed out to build our first snowman. He went straight to sleep and napped happily whilst we played – until Belle went to check in on him and woke him up shouting “nice sleep Freddie?” into the stroller. Poor Freddie.
Being the best Mama for my two means knowing when I need to take a break and recharge, which is not something that I am good at. But seeing what a positive effect it has on my ability to just enjoy the kids again is really telling. I hope that these pictures always remind me of that little lesson.
I also hope that this is the first of many family snow days this winter, because today was so much fun… even if I am still trying to dry everything around the apartment!